Today is Easter Sunday. It was cloudy, rainy and chilly. It was a good day to stay inside and read. I just finished reading the Kindle version of "He is not me," by Stuart McNaughton. As a deaf person who has grown up in a hearing world, I could identify with Stuart. Stuart lives in England and he just published his book. Every deaf person who is oral, speaks and lipreads, and grew up in a hearing family should read the book.
I have changed and grown so much since first being implanted in my left ear in October, 2010. I had my right ear implanted in February, 2012. Yesterday was Doctor's Day, and I would have liked to have thanked my surgeon yet once again. He is on the West Coast now, so distance separates us.
Cochlear Implants allows me to function as a hearing person each day as I put on my cochlear implant processors and leave in the early dawn hours for work. Yet, every day when I come home and get ready for bed at night and lay down in bed to sleep, I am deaf again.
Cochlear Implants are not a cure for deafness, but it certainly has made my existence in a hearing world easier. I no longer struggle to understand conversations in a noisy environment, at work, or in my everyday interactions with a hearing public. I am a more relaxed driver now that I can hear emergency and police sirens long before the vehicle enters my field of vision.
I definitely have more confidence in myself. That has been a long time coming. It has been an experience going from a "no you can't do that because you are deaf" mindset to "I can do these things with my cochlear implants." For so long, deaf people have been held back because of their disability. I certainly was limited by my deafness. Absolutely.
I see a future where I contribute my knowledge and skill set in situations where deaf people may need reasonable accommodation in the workplace while recuperating from cochlear implant surgery. There is a knowledge gap among medical personnel, human resources and management when it comes to reintroducing a newly implanted person back into the workforce. Many supervisors really don't know how to accommodate someone who is deaf and newly implanted with a cochlear implant, or two.
I still remember with the utmost clarity the day I went on a job interview, freshly out of graduate school. I had just finished telling the interviewer my capabilities, only to be told, "That's fine, Jane Doe, but what is it that you CAN'T do?" I would love to go back in time and tell that person, with cochlear implants, I can fully function in the workplace, including answering the telephone!
I still have my deaf habits. I am still a very visual person. I still lipread, but I am also hearing what I lipread. To this day, I prefer backing my car into a parking space so that I can see in front of me when I am pulling out of a space. I also toot my horn when backing out of a parking space. Not because I can't hear other people or cars. I still drive with my day light running lights on. I also will turn on my headlights when I am passing a semi truck on the interstate so the truck driver can see me. All because of habit, and years of being profoundly deaf. I'm still profoundly deaf. That hasn't changed
Helen Keller once said that deafness cuts off one from people. Well, with cochlear implants, that no longer has to be the case.
I no longer feel isolated. As a single deaf person, I am very good at entertaining myself, and I had to learn to be alone and not to fear it. I rarely am bored because there is always something to do. If I feel lonesome, all I have to do is e-mail someone, call someone, or do something for someone who has a need.
I still continue to be stunned at how deaf I am. I still am in awe of what cochlear implants are doing for me. I still enjoy hearing the birds in the early hours of the morning as I leave for work.
Learning to hear with cochlear implants has been the hardest thing I have ever done, but also the most rewarding.
Amazing.
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
The Smart phone version of climbing Mount Everest
My captioned phone at work is out of commission and needs replacing. I needed to call a doctor's office to confirm an appointment I had for this Friday. I had my audiologist remove the software program which allows a person to use the telephone and block out all sound, including your own voice. For Hearing Aid users, they may have a microphone-t-switch that allows for more clarity of sound and speech over the phone. I have a iPhone 4S with a voice and data plan. I had thought the phone was incompatible with my cochlear implant processor until someone told me just have the audiologist remove the t-coil program and it will eliminate any interference like buzzing, crackling sounds or electromagnetic interference. I did that. I wasn't using the program anyway.
Well, I got brave and decided I would TRY calling the doctor's office and confirming that appointment.
I took a deep breath and dialed my cell phone. I had no trouble understanding the menu prompts and responded appropriately. I gave the receptionist my name and pertinent information. She realized that Friday was Good Friday, and the office would be closed. April was busy, but I was able to schedule a follow up visit for May 1st. We had no problems understanding each other and I was able to hear and understand the entire conversation.
For someone who has no hearing memory aside from what I remember hearing with hearing aids, and who has been deaf since age 2 1/2, I not only felt victorious, I felt as if I had climbed the equivalent of Mount Everest, Smartphone style.
This is HUGE. I never thought in my lifetime that I would be hearing on a cell phone, let alone have a coherent conversation on a smartphone!
It has been two years and five months since I was implanted in my left ear, and a year and one month since I was implanted in my right ear.
I also met my cousins for lunch who are in town for Spring Break. We had lunch at the Hard Rock Café, and I had no trouble understanding the woman who waited on our table or the Hard Rock Café staff. My cousins and I had a good lunch and a good visit!
It really IS a brain thing. Absolutely! Hearing bilaterally with two cochlear implant processors is truly a blessing.
So here's to Easter Joy, Blessings and rejoicing that I had my first smartphone conversation without captions with someone who I wasn't sure I'd understand speech!
AMAZING.
Well, I got brave and decided I would TRY calling the doctor's office and confirming that appointment.
I took a deep breath and dialed my cell phone. I had no trouble understanding the menu prompts and responded appropriately. I gave the receptionist my name and pertinent information. She realized that Friday was Good Friday, and the office would be closed. April was busy, but I was able to schedule a follow up visit for May 1st. We had no problems understanding each other and I was able to hear and understand the entire conversation.
For someone who has no hearing memory aside from what I remember hearing with hearing aids, and who has been deaf since age 2 1/2, I not only felt victorious, I felt as if I had climbed the equivalent of Mount Everest, Smartphone style.
This is HUGE. I never thought in my lifetime that I would be hearing on a cell phone, let alone have a coherent conversation on a smartphone!
It has been two years and five months since I was implanted in my left ear, and a year and one month since I was implanted in my right ear.
I also met my cousins for lunch who are in town for Spring Break. We had lunch at the Hard Rock Café, and I had no trouble understanding the woman who waited on our table or the Hard Rock Café staff. My cousins and I had a good lunch and a good visit!
It really IS a brain thing. Absolutely! Hearing bilaterally with two cochlear implant processors is truly a blessing.
So here's to Easter Joy, Blessings and rejoicing that I had my first smartphone conversation without captions with someone who I wasn't sure I'd understand speech!
AMAZING.
Sunday, March 3, 2013
Hearing Memory
As someone who has been deaf since around age two and a half, I have no "hearing memory" of what it means to hear "normally."
For me, "normal hearing" with analog hearing aids is my conscious "hearing memory." I never did like digital hearing aids, even though I wore digital behind the ear hearing aids for ten years prior to getting my first cochlear implant.
It took me a long time - it wasn't until I could "hear" bilaterally with cochlear implants that I had a better sense of my own "hearing memory" and what I wanted in hearing with cochlear implants.
Two years and three months of hearing with one cochlear implant, and one year of hearing with two cochlear implants, I can hear with the aid of bilateral cochlear implants. I hear environmental noises. I hear high, middle and low frequencies.
I am very happy with this last mapping, and now feel comfortable in hearing bilaterally with cochlear implants.
Those of us who deafness is "our normal," we want to hear everything. For me, that means being able to hear my car idle, the gears shift, the turn signal clicking, the 18 wheeler truck's engine idling behind me at a traffic signal. Being able to hear a jackhammer from inside the kitchen of my townhouse a block away. The sound of birds chirping and twittering in the early hours of the morning.
Here's something that's telling. For someone who was late deafened, the sound of the grocery cart wheels around the aisle made her tense up because she couldn't tolerate the sound. For me, I had never heard the sound of the grocery cart wheels, but I could tell from the squeaking sound that someone was coming in my direction, and I could say, "Excuse me."
To me, not having grocery cart collisions in the grocery store is a relief! There is one sound that I absolutely hate. The sound of someone chewing and snapping gum in my office all day long. I am learning to tune that particular sound out, but I still do not like that sound.
Some people do not like the sound of wind. Others find that the sound of a ticking clock bothers them. When I was growing up, my parents had clocks with pendulums all over the house. All with a different sound "flavor," and reassuring me as each clock chimed the hour.
Speech recognition continues to improve, but it is taking time. I find that bilaterally, I can hear and understand simple sentences without lipreading. That was impossible for me to do in August, 2010.
I still am a very visual person, and still have my "deaf habits." I had someone tell me last week I had a unique accent, and she asked where I was from. I told her. I probably should have said this is my deaf southern accent!! I mean no malice. Deaf people do have a sense of humor, and it takes a deaf person to understand my humor in this instance!
Hearing bilaterally with cochlear implants continues to be a gift which I cherish everyday.
I am blessed.
For me, "normal hearing" with analog hearing aids is my conscious "hearing memory." I never did like digital hearing aids, even though I wore digital behind the ear hearing aids for ten years prior to getting my first cochlear implant.
It took me a long time - it wasn't until I could "hear" bilaterally with cochlear implants that I had a better sense of my own "hearing memory" and what I wanted in hearing with cochlear implants.
Two years and three months of hearing with one cochlear implant, and one year of hearing with two cochlear implants, I can hear with the aid of bilateral cochlear implants. I hear environmental noises. I hear high, middle and low frequencies.
I am very happy with this last mapping, and now feel comfortable in hearing bilaterally with cochlear implants.
Those of us who deafness is "our normal," we want to hear everything. For me, that means being able to hear my car idle, the gears shift, the turn signal clicking, the 18 wheeler truck's engine idling behind me at a traffic signal. Being able to hear a jackhammer from inside the kitchen of my townhouse a block away. The sound of birds chirping and twittering in the early hours of the morning.
Here's something that's telling. For someone who was late deafened, the sound of the grocery cart wheels around the aisle made her tense up because she couldn't tolerate the sound. For me, I had never heard the sound of the grocery cart wheels, but I could tell from the squeaking sound that someone was coming in my direction, and I could say, "Excuse me."
To me, not having grocery cart collisions in the grocery store is a relief! There is one sound that I absolutely hate. The sound of someone chewing and snapping gum in my office all day long. I am learning to tune that particular sound out, but I still do not like that sound.
Some people do not like the sound of wind. Others find that the sound of a ticking clock bothers them. When I was growing up, my parents had clocks with pendulums all over the house. All with a different sound "flavor," and reassuring me as each clock chimed the hour.
Speech recognition continues to improve, but it is taking time. I find that bilaterally, I can hear and understand simple sentences without lipreading. That was impossible for me to do in August, 2010.
I still am a very visual person, and still have my "deaf habits." I had someone tell me last week I had a unique accent, and she asked where I was from. I told her. I probably should have said this is my deaf southern accent!! I mean no malice. Deaf people do have a sense of humor, and it takes a deaf person to understand my humor in this instance!
Hearing bilaterally with cochlear implants continues to be a gift which I cherish everyday.
I am blessed.
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